I got my first license one week after my 16th birthday. I chose to wear my finest men's plaid shirt from the Gap. I also thought that the greatest hair I could achieve would be to blow dry my perm out and then use the actual iron to finish straightening it. It was a glorious photo, two thirds of it was hair and then a sliver of face and plaid. It was the old Utah green laminated licence and I couldn't wait to get the blue version that said adult. In my angst of having a green license I spelled my own name wrong when singing and had to shove an awkward "E" in to my middle name. It must have been destiny that spelling was not in the cards of this licence. I had had this licence for 4 years before I realized the DMV had spelled my last name wrong. I got pulled over and the cop was back in his car forever, finally he came back and said, "How do you pronounce your last name?" I had to stifle back laughter as I said, Smith, the traditional pronunciation. On my license my last name read SMTIH, I didn't get a ticket, but I did have to promise to go to the DMV and correct my records.
I went to the DMV to change SMTIH back to SMITH. The girl helping me asked if I was a natural redhead, I replied "Yes." She informed me that she had a thing for natural redheads, which I had already deduced as she had a redheaded woman tattooed on her arm. She said I couldn't handle her other redhead tattoos. After much badgering from my friend she informed us that she had a flaming "who-ha" tattooed on her chest. I was baffled as to why she didn't think I could handle that, was she not paying attention when I told her I was a natural redhead, I came with the factory flaming "who-ha" and not the after market addition she had.
It was my 21st birthday and I was in what is lovingly referred to as my "fine arts major stage." I once again thought a button down shirt would be ideal, but this time it was from the women's department. I layered it with a full length wrap sweater, big dark lips and big curly hair. I had wanted to tie a floral scarf around my neck, which became the staple of the fine arts look, but I didn't own one that matched my over sized amethyst earrings. I was so exited to have the blue adult license that I wasn't thinking when I put it in my pocket and sat on it, permanently creasing my license and irritating me to no end. I had this licence for 10 years. People have told me they prefer my hair short, people have told me growing it out was the best thing I have ever done, I've been told that it doesn't look like me unless I smile. This license has been with my throughout my twenties and I was rather sad to see it go, but it expires in a week and so to the DMV I went.
After two very dated photos I thought long and hard about what I should wear. I decided an aubergine boat neck shirt would be classic. The man taking the pictures was not happy and seemed irritated that I wanted to take my fur trimmed puffer coat off, but this was my moment, my hair was perfect, my outfit was well planned and I would not let his time schedule ruin my photo. FLASH and off I went. I filled out the final form, took a vision test, signed and dated the form, certified my information and was then handed my temporary licence. OH HOLY MOTHER!!! The picture is a close up of my chubby cheeks, my long red hair is hanging over my shoulders and all you can see is the top of my collarbone/breast plate - in other words, it looks like I am not wearing a shirt at all. Thank you universe, I had no idea you were such a fan of the button up. Wish me luck at bars and airports as this will be the decade of the Lady Godiva license.
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