It's my blog, I'll say balls if I want to.....

I am awkward. If you are reading this my awkwardness should be no surprise to you. I am especially awkward at funerals. I am attending a funeral on Tuesday, which means I am going to cry inappropriately. I can't help it, it is who I am. So in order to curb some of the awkwardness I have decided to write about balls. I will think of this post during the funeral and perhaps it will make me smile instead of "ball"ing like a baby.

My Top Five Favorite Ball Stories, in no particular order.

1. When I am upset, flustered, irritated or drop something I like to say BALLS, but I really like to say it like BAWLS for emphasis. It is most often shouted when playing nintendo games. I feel like it is more lady like than saying shit.

2. I played Junior Jazz for two seasons as an adolescent, it's okay I will wait while you let that soak in. I didn't know that you switched baskets after the half, so the only basket I made counted for the other team.

3. My entire family was once riding in a 15 passenger van. "Someone" (to protect the innocent, and I don't mean DaveCall this time) asked if I preferred uniballs or sharpies. They were asking about pens, but that is not where my mind went, I began laughing uncontrollably. I then got called by my full name RANDI LYNNE! For the record sharpie pens are my absolute favorite, they make me happy in ways I cannot fully express.

4. I work in a store that sells "decorative orbs" or balls as they are often called. I giggle each time a customer asks, "Do you have any balls", "You gave me 40% off on my balls right" or my personal favorite "Could I put my blue balls on hold." Truly I am no better than a child with a bank account.

5. I don't actually have five stories about balls. BALLS! Five things about balls just sounded better than four.