You Shouldn't Have

I am watching the Today show and they are going over great gift ideas. The presenter said that you can't go wrong with Ralph Lauren candles-everyone would love one. This girl wouldn't and for numerous reasons.

1. I have a candles-being-lit-phobia. I am sure that this stems from having our apartment go up in flames when I was a child. I have candles that I have never lit that I still have to make sure are not lit before I go on vacation (don't judge, I'm being honest). For those of you keeping track at home - I have had a home go up in flames and a home flooded, are you sure you think it is safe to live with me DaveCall?

2. A Ralph Lauren candle?!? Ralph you have great shirts, boots and dresses - but candles? You name on this ball of wax means that it can be sold for five times the actual value. I think that if someone gave me a Ralph Lauren candle I would look at it and then say, "I'm not really in to Ralph, I've always preferred Tommy." This is a lie, I've never cared for Tommy.

3. A tartan candle? Who needs a tartan candle? The only person that needs a tartan candle is someone who has a library full of wooden ducks. Oh no, I can't have this tartan it is the rival clan's tartan. This would also be a lie because I am a Smith, not a McSmith - I don't even know if Smith's have a tartan or a rival clan.

4. If you are giving me a tartan Ralph Lauren candle it means you don't know me at all, and it just really wasn't necessary for you to give me a gift, and so you shouldn't have. A warm smile and a Happy Holidays would mean more.